ADHD Help

I was recently thinking about the problems that parents have in public places managing children who have ADHD.  The children easily can become overly stimulated and wild.  They have a difficult time sitting still.  They talk too loudly.  The become bored easily.  Many also have Oppositional Defiant Disorder in addition to ADHD.

Before going out in public, it is important to :

1.  Anticipate the problems so that you can develop a  plan of action.  It is always better to act rather than react.

2.  Tell your child the ground rules in advance.  Let your child know what the consequences will be both for compliance and non-compliance.  Having a reward system in place is frequently helpful.  Immediate consequences are very important.

3.  When you arrive in the public place, identify a private place to which you can take your child, if needed, to deal with any problems.  It can be embarrassing to discipline your child in front of lots of other people.   A private place could be your car, the bathroom, or a corner away from everyone.

4.  Plan a structure which will reduce the possibility that the problems will occur.  For example, if you know that your children will fight with each other, keep them physically apart.  At the Seder I recommended separating some siblings, and we even sat some of them with other families.

5.  In a church or synagogue event, you should feel free enlisting the help of other adults.  Don’t feel as if you are alone.  Religious groups should function as extended families.

6.  Don’t let one child’s problems interfere with everybody else’s enjoyment.  If necessary, you can have a sitter on call, and entirely remove the child from the event without significantly interfering with your involvement.

7.  Many problems recur.  If you don’t figure out how to manage the problem  properly the first time around, go “back to the drawing board” and come up with a better plan for any recurrence.

8.  If your child takes medication, remember that medication is not just for school.  It can also make it easier for your child to succeed in public places.

I hope these suggestions are helpful.

Periodically someone claims that ADHD is related to genius.  Unfortunately there is no research to support this.  People with ADHD come from all levels of the intelligence spectrum from way above average to way below average.  The last letter of ADHD stands for disorder for a reason.  In fact, in order to make the diagnosis, you must identify significant impairment.  Without impairment, we are not supposed to diagnosis ADHD.
Now, on the other hand, there are a lot of very successful people who have ADHD.  Check out the list at http://add.about.com/od/famouspeoplewithadhd/a/famouspeople.htm

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